The Christmas Ticket

It was right before Christmas, and all through the house. Wait a minute! That’s another story. As I began to say, it was right before Christmas when Carole, my sister who lives in California, called saying she needed a certified copy of my brother-in-law George’s divorce decree. Now mind you, Carole and George have been married since I was a kid, so does that tell you how long it’s been? Nevertheless, they needed to prove that he was divorced, so that George and Carole could prove that their marriage was legal, so the courts would recognize Katie, their adopted daughter, as their daughter, even though they adopted her years ago also. Go figure that one! What people don’t go through when the government is involved much less two governments. Just for the record, Katie is one of four children my sister and her husband adopted in Mexico.

Now that explains what I was doing at the Courts Building on a snowy morning in December. But it doesn’t explain my first-ever parking ticket. I don’t generally go around breaking laws. I attempted to teach my kids to obey them also, so it wouldn’t look quite right if mom was “out of integrity.” It was snowing quite a bit and I was in a hurry and didn’t see the yellow line on the curb when I pulled up to park. I had taken an early lunch to avoid the downtown rush. It didn’t help. Even with the snowstorm, the Courts Building was filled with a host of unusual individuals. From what I could see, I’ll more than bet there were a lot of stories to be told there that day; and, I usually only bet on sure things.

I went through metal detectors as if I were a criminal, but I wasn’t, not yet. They sent me upstairs to a lady I had spoken to yesterday on the telephone. I had the foresight to call to be sure I knew where I was going, what I needed, and how long it would take. Talk about panic! Carole told me when she called that she definitely needed the papers before the court date or Katie would face the possibility of being deported right before Christmas. How did all of this get dumped into my lap at the last minute, I kept asking the Universe! The urgency in Carole’s voice together with a lot of fear I heard on the phone that day, made it quite clear that I needed to keep on top of things to get the job done. With the holidays upon us, I didn’t have much time. Again when I got there, they told me that it usually takes weeks to get a certified copy of a divorce decree and added that they were behind because of Christmas. I was beginning to see that “little panic” in my own thoughts as well. How could I get this overnited to Carole in time when I was getting this response from the federal clerk?

I began explaining to this total stranger the perplexing situation, and that it could result in someone being deported at Christmas time. I was lucky that she was a giving, caring individual who took pity on the situation, I guess, because she began making plans to expedite the process. She gave me specifics on how we could get this done by the very next day if I cooperated fully. I listened attentively and followed her instructions to the letter. I had to pay in advance for all the paperwork, and then left the building praying. “Dear God, make this work, work a miracle.” My prayers are as short as I am sometimes, but God knows what my needs are, and I figure, get right to the point and don’t waste His time.

When I got back to my car, there was this ticket -- big as day -- on my windshield. I really didn’t need this problem, much less the unexpected bill. But, the next day I went back, got the papers and sent them to Carole as promised. Job done! Now, I just needed to send off the check for the ticket and all would be right again. Right? Wrong!

Two weeks later I received a notice in the mail from the Traffic Violations Bureau. I hadn’t paid the fine, “they said.” In addition, they were charging me a late fee plus court costs. How could this be? Why me? I called the Bureau and the lady who answered the phone took the time to explain things since I was a “first offender.” “We don’t go by the postmark date,” she said. “We go by the date that the bank posts it to our account, and if you don’t mail the additional fine in the next four days, it will triple.” WHAT! When I inquired how often people complain about being charged when their checks were mailed in enough time to be credited, she noted that it wasn’t too often, only around the holidays, and then she chuckled. Now it’s quite curious since the post office and the traffic bureau are both government offices, isn’t it?

Later, while having a conversation with my girlfriend, I began to wonder if they didn’t have a special financial thing going for themselves. Mary Clerk at the bureau calls Sam Postman at the post office around this time of year and says, “Hey, we need to get some revenues up. Hold those traffic tickets a couple days, then bank ‘em!” Then you might imagine Sam’s reply to be, “Sure, no problem,” as they both then exchange a holiday chuckle. I’m a little wiser now, but also a little poorer. I realize that when I prayed to God, I should have asked Him to find a way to pay all the expenses as well. Maybe my prayer was just a little too short! Know what I mean!