One Deep Experience


I’m in my fifty-second year of these experiences called “Life” and I am currently unemployed. This is one of those times I find myself reflecting on all my past experiences and finding those which give me the greatest support with regard to where I am today. Where was I today? Well, for the first time in my life I was asking for assistance from my newly adopted Jewish community. I converted on January 24, 2003 and during that time I was given a tour of the Mikvah where my conversion took place. I arrived a little early and sat in the alcove, waiting for Maggie. A book captured my eye with its beautiful pictures and nurturing poems, so I read it. As I finished the book and put it back on the shelf I looked up at the wall and saw a notice posted. The Jewish Loan Association was offering loans at no interest. It was truly a sign from God. I wrote down the phone number and sat back down to thank God for the blessing.

On Monday morning, I promptly called the number to inquire about a loan. Well I didn’t qualify because I wasn’t employed, but… they had an assistance program I might qualify for so the lady set up an appointment with me for Wednesday. Today is Wednesday and I’m driving to the Association for my appointment and praying to God all the way there that I’ll qualify this time. Sue came through the door into the waiting room with what seemed like a lot of papers to fill out, but it didn’t bother me. I wasn’t in a hurry to go anywhere. I had no job waiting to get to at this point in my life so I waded through the papers, pouring out all my personal history onto each section of inquiries. She came back once but I was still checking off answers and filling in blanks.

When she returned the second time, I had just finished. She had a gracious and compassionate smile and led me back through the big door toward her office. She explained what she could do in the way of helping pay some of my utilities. Then she laid out the next steps that could happen if I was still unemployed in a couple of weeks. I had held the tears back as long as I could when the relief came over me that I might be safe in my home for another month. Those tears weren’t about fear; they were tears of gratitude. I sat there, knowing and experiencing the feelings that others had experienced but I had not known until now. Maybe it was necessary for me to be walking now in someone else’s shoes – but these shoes were mine. I can truly say I have, in the past, had compassion for anyone in the position of unemployment and need and have helped others when needed throughout my life. But I didn’t truly know those feelings they were experiencing. I could have only imagined at the time. I now know how it feels to be at what you consider your lowest point in your life and to have someone compassionately hold out a hand. Sue had no ounce of judgment in her persona. There was nothing condescending coming from her lips, no pity in her eyes. But that compassion she gave freely to me was the dearest gift of all.

We were just about finished with the additional papers for me to sign for my assistance, when she asked if I could use some food and toothpaste. When the word “toothpaste” came rolling off her lips, a big smile came on my face. “Toothpaste!” I repeated! “Yes, toothpaste!” I acknowledged. Who would have thought I would be so happy to hear she was giving me toothpaste. I had been squeezing my tube until it was so curled up to the cap that it couldn’t squeeze anymore and today was the last drop! Saved! She instructed me to pull my car around to the side and wait for her. In a couple of minutes she was helping me put some bags of food into the back of my car. I thanked her again as she ran back inside to get out of the cold. All the way home I cried, thankful for God having given us something to sustain us in our time of need and praying that if possible, this experience could be over shortly.

I want someone to know how compassionate and wonderful Sue Rundblad is to those in need. Thank you. Sue for being you.

Michele