If you ever run into Mike Lainoff, please remind him how much his friendship has meant to me. I first met Mike a couple of years ago when I started working at the front desk of the Jewish Community Center in Chesterfield. I was sitting at the desk scanning cards when he walked in through the front door with this big grin on his face. He was happy to see me, and he didn’t even know me yet!
It only took him throwing a few quips my way to spark our friendship. He was surprised that first time I came back with a quick reply. It probably seemed like my response was a silent challenge to him for more of the same! He was up for it though and started looking forward, as I did, to the evenings we worked together at the front desk.
So… what have I learned from Mike? Well, we have had some heavy and interesting conversations regarding life, the Zohar, and all my questioning. On some occasions, other members have stopped as they were passing to join in and share some of their own thoughts and experiences with us on the topic of the evening. I have listened and laughed with him while he recounted endless, vivid stores of his days at Camp Sabra; we even sang a song or two (when no one was around). He would start singing, thinking I couldn’t possibly know the song, and then in a second I would chime in to harmonize with him.
Each story was brought to life by the love in the memories he had of those children he mentored. As members passed the front desk, they would stop to talk to him, asking if he remembered them. It never failed; he remembered something about each of them, carried in his heart all these years, and brought back to life in the moment as they each went on to describe to me those days they spent at camp when they were younger – and then, each added a side story of how Mike had influenced their lives.
As our friendship deepened, he would share how his wife, Fritzi, was this week and what she was up to as well in her life. I had first met Fritzi when I was converting and taking classes. She said she was there for somewhat of a refresher course and we hit it off that first night as well. One night when Mike was talking about his wife, he called her by name – Fritzi – I just knew there couldn’t be two Fritzi’s! It warmed my heart to know that two people I cared for were married and had each other for love and support. In some sad moments this last year, when his mother-in-law passed on, Mike recalled good times with her over the years and added with a sweet smile that her life was indeed a blessing. I’ve listened to him talk fondly of his children as well, and feel as though I know them too.
I’ve learned a lot about my community as Mike introduced me to them; one at a time, while they walked past us on their way to activities. He would share a memory with each of them as a way of an introduction for me. It was through his sharing that the seeds of these new friendships began to take root.
Most importantly, I’ve learned to remind myself to “be good to myself” as Mike would say with a smile each evening as he said good night to me. I’ve been privileged to know Mike Lainoff and to have shared some of life’s experiences with him. He’s the closest thing to a Mench I’ve met yet! So, like I said, if you run into him, remind him of me and let him know I love him.
By
Michele C. Long
