Now, as things would happen, in my forties, circumstances changed in my life and, within a six-year span, I was changing my lifestyle as well. I took on the challenge willingly, mind you, but again at times my life choices were more controlled by materialism than me. I knew that I would have the strength to adjust to any new circumstance that came my way. As fate would have it, and by some miracle -- it happens often that when I find myself down and at wits end, I am suddenly reminded of an experience from my past that would seem to be meant to enlighten me, if not at the time of occurrence, then now. So it has happened once more.
I consider myself to be strong of character, mind you, but to come to the realization that materialism was in fact controlling my existence, took the greatest strength thus far. You see, no one would fault me if I hadn't recognized it for myself; many don't, others do and choose to close their eyes to it all. In our society, you don't seem to be able to turn your head without being beckoned by greed to acquire possessions symbolizing success, or by fear of not having enough to survive.
I was reminded just a moment ago though, of my grandmother. She appeared in my eyes to be one who lived not governed by materialism. If we didn't have something, she often told the child or grandchild quite softly, that "we could look at it this way...", and then proceeded to give us an explanation of why it wasn't meant to be at this time. The phrase "at this time" was the clincher. She left room for possibility and for another chance further on down the road, if God willed it to happen.
No -- grandma wasn't of Oriental culture, and I seriously doubt that she read up on it in her lifetime; but, she was as wise as any wise man. In her very acceptance of what was so, she kept control of her life and her joy. Materialism didn't have a chance to rob her of either. It was another wise friend who just last week reminded me that it is those simple pleasures of life that we remember and carry on with us throughout our journey that are the true treasures of value.
I remember many a time spent at grandmas. We would have Sunday dinner together, and afterwards, some were in the kitchen singing and laughing, while grandma was in the dining room playing the piano -- and the rest of us were scattered throughout her home, singing along. Wherever we were at the time she started playing the piano, we stopped our conversation and began to sing in tune (and some out of tune) with her, but of course, we still got the dishes done while having fun. It just didn't seem a chore when there was music echoing throughout.
In my foolishness, I thought I had overcome materialism, yet, as with any a "double-edged sword", it would be best for me to have let it lie. I have begun the practice now of acknowledging materialism's presence in order to also acknowledge that I will choose not to give it control of my life. God took care of grandma, through her faith in Him and herself. I have also come to recognize that you can't have faith in God without having faith in yourself, as neither is separable. So, sadly enough to say, it is those times when I had lacked faith in myself, that I also was grouping God into that category. This will serve to remind me that, in the future, my faith in God supports my faith in myself.
Grandma may have had moments of doubt, but if she did, they were short-lived. She was a woman in control of her life. While the others in our large family went about their lives during the week, I was the lucky one, spending most of my weekdays at grandmas. Dad usually made sure that we lived close-by, or at least in walking distance and, for a large part of my youth, I spent my afternoons in grandma's kitchen. We didn't have much time to watch television in the daytime. If we weren't doing homework, she would be teaching me to crochet, or playing card games, and then there were always stories. At dinnertime, she would cook and I would set the table. Of all her children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren, I had my own special plate, which I later came to find out was an antique. I had a good eye for the finer things even in my youth! When I grew up, Grandma gave it to me, but the treasure in this plate remains only because it holds the precious memories of my childhood and times spent with Grandma. Grandma didn't tire of my endless questions, and her answers were not only interesting but also filled with humor. I think that's how grandma got through life -- with humor. Grandma, being the matriarch of the family, had to have a sense of humor; she had twelve children (each with their own identity.) She taught us all that we could meet any experience and come out the victor if we just kept our sense of humor.
John "J.C." Long, Grandma Adele Deken, and Jason Michael Long (a couple of days old)
